I made one of the biggest mistakes I have made in a really long time... Today, when I was at my meeting, my teacher asked me about my background, I sort of lied... I told them one of my friends was a Satanist, and he told me about positive things about it. Although I never converted to it. And I said I was never a Satanist. I basicly was shaking when I said that, becaus some sort of explosion happened in my head... And then my face felt like it was literally burning... I felt so guilty for saying that... But I didn't want to tell them I was a Satanist, because I knew they would talk about me behind my back. And I was one of those really quiet people, because I didn't like exposing myself...
And on this very night when I was walking back home, I felt alone.. I didn't feel strong anymore, I felt nothing really... I use to feel tough everywhere I went, but this night was different, it was like the power that was lent to me because of my spiritual path has been taken away...
Guilt can cause many harmful ways.Sometimes telling the truth is better cuz it reliefs you.Even if people talking behind you.You can just ignore them and do things good.(i`m not converting you)
Thats where you choose.Hide your secret or tell the truth.Other points can be included as well.But it all depends on you.
That situation really sux.A LOT!
I wondered why so many religious "Protaganist" are there to kill those who had never done any harm.
They can`t do anything like that cuz they too can be sent to hell!(REal thing! Modern Peoples are under control by religions!)They want to kill every So-called "satanist."
Back to the topic again.I think its best you cover your secret and tell them that you`re doing well.
It can be very difficult telling people of your beliefs especially if they are not mainstream. My mother hit the wall when i told her i was a pagan and my family arn't even religious and some of my friends got scared and wouldnt speak to me. But looking back on it i do feel better for telling them as that was who i was, those who didnt like it could kiss my butt.
Also know my friends are understanding and even my mother is lol. It can be a shock to people and they might lash back but just ignore them be proud of who you are
I don't want them to hate me fargoth... I want to be friends with them, they hold alot of things that they could teach me, especially shape shifting, thats one of the teachers favourite subjects.
Mef I think you mean "Profanatist?" I donh't think they are, but it's just a thought that Pagans would dislike Satanists. And till this very day I have voices screaming at me reminding me of that momment, and it's getting me so frustrated, and I keep regretting what I did. I Shouldve told them more about me..
Maybe you shoud approach them again and explain to them why you said it and how you felt they might react to you. I'm sure they will be understanding. I myself am a pagan in faith but i have quite a few satanist friends and i respect there beliefs. I think you would feel better if you went back to them and explained and told them who the true you is. If they do not understand(which i find unlikely) maybe look for another person to help you.
