Need Advice

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Need Advice
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Post # 1
Hey everyone,
So, I'm not sure how relevant to the site this is, but I hope you guys will understand and maybe offer advice.
I have a few close friends who have no idea that I practice the Craft or that my religion is Wicca, and by the way I know the terms don't have to go together, but I practice both. Anyway, I don't like to hide things about myself and I try to be as honest as possible, so if majority of my friends are Christian who don't understand the subject, how do I show my true colors?
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Re: Need Advice
By: / Novice
Post # 2
Be wise about it. If you are living somewhere where you feel being Wiccan would be unsafe [threats, harassment, bullying] I would avoid coming out of the broom closet for now. If you feel you need to be open, regardless of peoples reactions, I would start gradually, wear a pentacle necklace, or read a book on Wicca in public and see how people react [you can then judge if you want to go "it's because I'm Wiccan" or "It looked interesting"] Telling your friends, I would start with the friend you trust most and feel would accept you. Sit them down and ask to talk, and for them to listen to you, and when you're finished, you will happily answer any questions. Depending on how it goes, decide if you wish to tell other people, and if you wish to do so in a group, individually, or if your friend would help you talk to them.
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Re: Need Advice
By: / Beginner
Post # 3
Sometimes the mark of wisdom lies in silence. Just because you practice doesn't mean you need to announce it. ... Though don't take that to mean you need to hide it either. Just don't go out of your way to make such conversations happen. If your friends are curious or spiritually inclined then I am sure relevant topics will come up on their own in conversation. If the right question is asked or a fun idea gets thrown out for contemplation, Express your own thoughts as just that. Thoughts, ideas, casual philosophies, and ride along the current of the conversation.

Openness doesn't mean advertising. It just means willingness to speak honestly in the moment and to be without expectations.

That said, never begin a conversation if you aren't mentally prepared for judgement and challenges. People are going to disagree with you. They are going to have their own beliefs and assumptions. They are going to question why you believe and/or practice what you do. It is a normal and human thing to question and challenge. Try to not get angry or defensive in return. If they insist on their opinions let them. It doesn't hurt or invalidate you in any way. You have no obligation to change their minds. And, in fact, you might even grow to appreciate the opposition in a 'friendly banter' sort of way.

After all, your mind is where your ideas dwell. As long as you can reflect on yourself honestly and hold the beliefs and practices you have as tools to better yourself, why should the opinions of others matter?

Honestly I have learned more about myself and my beliefs through the discussions I have had with people who opposed me- be it through friendly debate or hostile criticism than I have in agreeable conversation. It has actually helped me stay grounded by forcing me to challenge and evaluate my ideas. Making me explore and evaluate the logic of my choices and experiences. And making me practice organising my thoughts into something that can be expressed in a thoughtful and reasoned way.

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Re: Need Advice
By:
Post # 4
Thanks for the advice. As of right now, I have only one friend who is completely aware of my beliefs, and she understands quite well for some one who doesn't practice the Craft. I have another friend who accepts me as I am even though she's Christian, it's just that she has been judged by others so even though she doesn't understand and often makes offensive comments without knowing it, she doesn't judge and like a good friend she keeps my secret. Everyone in my circle knows I don't believe in God, but that statement is vague and I did that for a reason. I'd rather not go in to detail of my beliefs with people who don't understand and have been taught to discriminate against people like me. It's not their fault, society has shaped their minds without them knowing. There are a few friends who I feel inclined to tell, but all they know is "she doesn't believe in God." And unfortunately, that statement conjures bad vibes, as society has done this to their minds. I want them to know so I don't have to keep secrets. Surprisingly, one of my friends mentioned being a Satanist, and he understands Wiccan beliefs, even though he doesn't practice. He doesn't openly tell people, and the reason for this is the same as mine. Another friend of mine once said he was Atheist, but I think he was joking. I think that if I'm going to be open about it, I should start with my friend who said he was Satanist. I'm waiting for an opportunity to come out, as I can't just suddenly declare something so misunderstood. I just hope they'll understand.
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