September is Suicide awareness and prevention month. I think it deserves a post.
Before I begin, it's necessary to say that the following is not advice for treatment or diagnosis, and that consulting a mental health professional is always recommended over trying to face life's toughest inner challenges on one's own. There is hope. There is getting better.
Here's something which took me far too long to realize: Life will be difficult, basically always. I also had to realize I'm not a victim of life, but that things happen which are out of my control and are not maliciously done to me; it's life.
So here is some advice: You are not your thoughts. You are not the desperation, the depression, the anxiety. You are not your emotions. You can overcome. You can learn how to cope, and you can improve. I believe in you.
I've come a long way over the past many years. At one point, I tried to take my own life. I'm glad whatever happened kept me from it (an epiphany about exactly why at that moment I was doing so). I'd dabbled in ideas of magic before then, and some years after that, I became more dedicated to it. That internal change is what has brought me to where I am now.
Am I cured of these symptoms? No. But I can cope better than I ever have before.
Would I recommend the path I've taken above all others? No. I would recommend professional help and learning healthy coping mechanisms in addition to it. But change is possible either way.
You're worth the improvement.