Ive kinda pushed all of this to the side, life and my perspective on it has pushed me away from my path, and Im uncertain if this is a good thing
However a memory recently resurfaced from about 3-4 years ago? I was 14-15 at the time, and I had decided I was going to use one of those meditation hypnosis see your spirit animal! YouTube videos. Now I know now that unfortunately, those kind of videos can inject ideas into your subconscious mind and it might not be accurate. However, something very weird happened.
He went through the typical elevator/stair analogy to get into as deep of a state you can get into, then he put me in a campsite. He told me to stand next to the fire, it was warm ext. and abruptly he said turn around, your spirit animal is next to you. I turned around, and I saw the strangest squirrel person mutation I have ever seen. I was immediately surprised and I was on the verge of tears (Im not sure why? I felt like I had failed and I will never connect with my spirit animal I think) as I turned around and started to wake up, in the distant trees I saw a great owl staring at me with sharp, gray, intelligent eyes. I tried to hold onto the meditation, but it collapsed and I woke up. I recall being so confused, and since then I have tried the same exercise with nothing happening. I remember trying right after because I was so worried I had offended the squirrel-person-thing, but theyve never showed again. Can anybody explain what happened? Was it all just a strange kind of lucid dream?
If you hadn't I would recommend looking up the meaning behind a squirrel the symbols itself may already have the answer the you are looking for. By the sounds of it the possible reason on why you cannot go through with the mediation again is most likely your own emotions are overwhelming you. When we are going through stressful or doubtfultimes it makes it hard to connect with spirit, try and heal from your own self doubt and work through these emotions slowly, maybe work on grounding and centering yourself. When the time comes you will be called to do the mediation again and that time you may end up with results that you had been expecting.
You would not have upsetthe spirit guide, most spirit guides understand human emotions. The spirit is most likely watching from a distance and allowing you to grow on your own for a little while. Before they decided to contact you again. As for what had happened this was just a mediation and normally trips such as yours arevery common during mediation especially ones where the person is being guide by a voice.
So uh I tried it again, and I saw none of the same things twice. I was in the rain, relaxed and a double headed ostrich that phased its neck into a single snake sat behind me, its head very close to my shoulder. I didnt say anything, it didnt seem right. But as I was going to leave the meditation hit a gong, and I saw triple slabbed rock monolith, the center being the largest. A grey white light shone from the edges, then taco man and doggo meme appeared behind it as I got confused and woke up. Once again, am I doing something wrong? I have aspergers if that changes the way my mind works? I dont know, Ive never heard of someone having a shape shifting spirit animal before