This happened 4 years ago. I had begun reading tarot and was actually pretty good at it. I did a daily reading for myself and for a while, I was drawing the same cards every day which was odd because I shuffled them well. It was always an outcome of trouble on the horizon. During this time I found out that I was pregnant and I lost that child. The way the doctor explained it was that it had never developed a heartbeat or progressed beyond 4 to 5 weeks, but that it was common to lose one like this and most women never even realise they were pregnant. The only reason I knew is because we were trying. I have always believed that my opening my third eye and reading Tarot is what caused me to lose my child, but I wanted to hear from people who are more experienced about it.
Losing that pregnancy caused a lot of trouble in my marriage and we almost divorced but we didn't and we have repaired the relationship to a better point than it was in at that time, and we have had another child who is a very strong child in both body and spirit. I have always felt like she is just a powerful soul who wanted to be born and made her way here. But I have always felt guilty because I think I did something unintentionally to end the pregnancy I had before her by opening myself to my natural gifts. Is that correct or not?
I do not think you opening up your gifts is the cause of the child dying. Like the doctor said it's fairly common for children to die during that time. What most likely happened is just the guilt and doubt of the aftermath which caused you to think it may had been your fault. When really it wasn't. Sadly these things happen but trying to open our gifts is not the cause of why it happened.
Re: Straneg result to reading By: Artindark Moderator / Adept
Post # 3 Sep 16, 2020
My fertility doctor explained to me that in most cases the reason for early loss was embryonic in nature and less due to issues with the woman's womb. Not all embryos that implant have the right genetics to progress to the point that a heartbeat develops. If certain gene which codes, for something essential is not functioning correct and its function is essential for life, the embryo no longer can continue developing and dies. The fact that you carried to full term another baby demonstrates that this was most probable cause for the loss of the pregnancy.
Many women have this intuition/knowing when something with their child/baby/fetus/embryo is not right. I lost count in how many videos for early and later loss in pregnancy the woman said that she felt that the baby is not okay in some shape or form. The embryo and mother's body communicate all the time via chemicals compounds called hormones. This is not necessary a conscious process but more of a subconscious, but often this unexplained feeling manifests into this sense of trouble brewing. If the baby is not developing and not communicating back hormonaly, eventually the female body figures that the pregnancy is not viable and the body starts to try to miscarry the dead tissue, as it can harm the mother in more advanced stages of pregnancy.
Infertility and loss of pregnancy in any stage brings a lot of pain and sense of loss and opens even older wounds. Nobody is at fault if random combination of genes caused the embryo's untimely departure. People though sometimes feel like they need explanation to have closure, so they just blame themselves or each other.
I felt that with my first loss that the embryo wanted to live so much and fought for its life, but the physical vessel was not perfect enough to support its further development. There is only so much we can do then.
Your natural gifts will not harm your embryo/fetus or baby as long as you do not undertake some workings that place a strain on your physical body and vital energy. Divination with Tarot is not something that causes extreme physical or energetic exhaustion. I still do divination, when I feel like it. However, I stopped (probably subconsciously) my physical/mental mediumship practices as these can put strain on both my physical body and energetic one and expose the baby to some negative energies. It is going to stay this way until I get my baby, if I can help it.
You need to recognize that you did not do anything wrong to place your embryo in danger and in harms way. You need to let go of this pain and guilt. Honor the little soul you lost and love even more the little soul that is now in your life. Guilt is a dark feeling, and it eats your heart away slowly and surely with time.
I do not think so that you did anything to cause this loss by using your intuition to do the reading. Most probably it was either your Higher Self or the spirit of the embryo who communicated to you intuitively to prepare for the upcoming loss. Alternatively it might have been a spirit guide you might not be aware of. You can actually do divination exactly to establish which one of the above it was the messenger. Just for your inner peace and healing.