As a forewarning this is just a description of a vision I keep having. I don't expect anyone to post telling me what it means or anything, but at the same time it'd be nice if you could. I'm pretty sure this is a common thing, so it might just have some cheesy textbook definition.
It's dark outside, with no streetlights, not even any moonlight. I walk up to a tall, nondescript building, and reach forward to open the door. The door is tall, and heavy, and extremely hard to move. Once inside, I feel a sudden sensation of fear. Before me is a hallway, long and without doors or any kind of decoration. I start to run down the hallway, for what seems like forever, with voices following me.
Voices of my friends, and loved ones.
I close my eyes, as if it'd drown out the sound. I no longer wanted to hear the truth, it had proven to be such poison in the past. Just as I close my eyes, I seem to step out, into nothingness... as if there was just a deep hole in the ground at the end of this hallway.
I scream as I fall, but nobody is there to hear me. Recalling my prior spiritual journies with my guide, I extend my wings (No, I don't really have wings in real life), long and black with the slightest iridescent sheen.
But it doesn't help. What feel like horrid claws and hands reach out to me from the cavern walls, ripping and tearing my wings apart and off. Miraculously, even this doesn't slow me down.
After a few more seconds of falling, the area around me lightens. I seem to just fall out into an entirely different world. A clearing, with people. Lots of people. Music. Flowers. A wedding. -My- wedding. The maids of honor drag me off and get me ready, ignoring the sad state I'm in. I suppose, nervousness about the big day also makes you look scared out of your wits?
Once I've been primped to their satisfaction, the day proceeds. My lover is there. It comes time to finalize the ordeal... kissing. As he leans forward, for a split second I see something out of the corner of my eye. A dark figure, seeming to swoop down. I feel an impact of some sort, and my new husband falls into my arms- dead.
There is understandable commotion. I break out into tears and don't even care to find out what had happened at the time. EMTs pronounce him dead when they arrive, with no hope of revival, even though nothing seemed truly wrong with him.
One of the maids of honor approaches me as I'm grieving. She says, "Change this, before it's too late."
It's always at this point that the vision ends.
It probably just means I have psychological issues.. but in any case, I'd like other opinions, or advice.
After I die I would like to be a lesser deity of cheesy textbook definitions. ;-P Here's how I interpreted it:
Darkness-- very introspective. No streetlights, no moonlight, mean it's just yourself guiding your own way.
The tall door-- regular doors aren't usually tall, so I guess it was something formal, like breaching through your civilized conscious self, which can be stubborn.
The hall -- reminds me of something I read in one of my mom's feng shui books, that you shouldn't have a length of unbroken hall (without mirrors or passages) or else the chi moves too fast or something and turns into an attack.
The fall -- the subconscious, an underworld of inner demons?
The wedding -- I'm guessing the light was sunny and the clearing was in a field or forest, keeping things natural? This could be the part of your spirit that's in charge of relief and recovery.
The attack -- well, relief and recover don't mean we get to go back to our old ways of innocence and naivete now that we have a promise of love and happiness... the testing is never over. Maybe the subconscious is trying to distance yourself from the support he represents, by killing him, and that's not always bad if it prevents one getting clingy and losing your center of being in another person, but the bridesmaid's advice could mean you should be embracing this support.
A much simpler, divinatory interpretation: if you're making deals that you're not completely at peace with, break or avoid them before someone other than you gets hurt?
The wedding was in a pretty specific place in west virginia that I've been to before. It was like mountainous/hilly and thickly wooded, and there were paths and places you could look out at the area from, when you got higher up. It was at one of those, at the highest point.
In any case, I do have a habit of being clingy, but never to a vice. I care, but I can stop caring in an instant. Life has taught me that skill. So, I'm not sure why I'd be told to be wary of that, if it's never been a problem before.
As far as the divinatory meaning... well... The only thing I could think of is the romance itself. It's about the only 'deal' I'm involved in right now, and I don't doubt that at all. I'm just worried that the other party does and that I'll get hurt again, it seems inevitable to me.
The rest I just wrote off as some strange form of depression since things have been difficult lately.
