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Last Seen: Sun, 17 Apr 2016
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Waiting for the Inevitable
As I wait here on this city street,
I think about what is to come,
What must come,
In order to save those who cannot save themselves.
I call up a taxi,
And ride away into the calm night.
The farther I get,
From those I loved but could not love me back,
I think about how I was never really happy,
How no matter I tried to deny it,
I was always alone,
And now the inevitable is about to come.
I am about to die,
To die for the ones whom I thought would care for me.
As the taxi comes to a stop,
I climb out into the darkness,
As thick as ink,
Thick enough to choke me to death.
The taxi pulls away,
And I put the pieces together,
Of what exactly had happened to make it all need to be this way.
I think and puzzle in my mind,
Until the cold truth hits me harder than my father ever could have,
And so cold it would be warmer to take a year long swim in the Arctic Ocean.
My friends, family, and thought to be loved ones,
Had done this all together,
As a murderous and lethal scheme to get rid of me.
Faster than the lightning that flashed,
A terrible storm broke over my head,
And left me alone and isolated next to the highway where I had been dropped off.
I try hard to fight my way against the roaring winds,
And even harder to escape my own mind,
Where the truth is held.
This curse laid upon me,
The curse that had put me through all this living hell,
Was finally and fully taking place.
I am unloved,
It was like that all along,
And it always will be.
Lightning strikes above my head,
I fall to my knees,
And begin to weep.
I hear footsteps heading towards me,
Slowly and surely,
But I do not raise my head.
As they stop next to me,
A man reached down,
And grabs hold of my neck.
He yanks my hair,
So hard he pulls a chunk out of my head,
And I throw my head back and scream in agony.
Once again he takes hold of my hair,
Uses it to hold my head back,
And pulls out a switch-blade.
He positions it against my neck,
The cold blade searing the skin along my throat,
And slowly and torturously slips it across my throat.
I cough and sputter,
And as my blood spilled out onto the ground,
One single image floats by my eyes.
It was an image of one person,
The one person that I loved most,
And I loved him so much that I was going to die for him.
And now as my very life spills out in front of my eyes,
I realize that I did not die for him,
I died because of him.
My body becomes so weak,
I completely collapse,
Onto the blood-soaked ground beneath me.
As my mind begins to go dark,
All my memories fade away,
And finally my eyes close for the last time.