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Extreme Advice Needed

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Forums -> Misc Topics -> Extreme Advice Needed

Extreme Advice Needed
By:
Post # 1
okay so my ex was basically my best friend until I got a new man. But here's the problem. I'm in love with my ex and I can't tell if he's still in love with me or if it all was just a joke. He was in my dreams before we met/came into contact and I don't dream like at all unless it has to do with me or someone close to me but he wasn't close to me at that time. Ten days after my birthday we met and became best friends. Started dating months afterwards. Since we broke up (this was done on an agreement), neither one of us is happy and he's fallen into smoking and drinking. I want to help him and help myself but I wanna see him happy before I make myself happy.

Can someone please please give me some advice. I guess I should add that I'm clairvoyant so you kind of understand that what I've just told you is actually real.
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Re: Extreme Advice Needed
By:
Post # 2
Why are the only options "still in love" or "it was a joke"? What ever happened to "he was in love and now he's not"?
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Re: Extreme Advice Needed
By:
Post # 3
Every time he looks at me, something in his eyes says he misses me and he's not one for admitting that he's wrong. I didn't ask for someone to do what youre doing I just asked for advice. I'm not meaning to sound rude with this I just wanna find out. If he's not I don't care I just want him to smile again and stop smoking and drinking himself to death. That's how badly in love I am with this one man.
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Re: Extreme Advice Needed
By: / Novice
Post # 4
then why did you break up? i have posted a love candle deviation that should help. just focus on your problem then look at the candle flame:

http://www.spellsofmagic.com/spells/life_spells/fortune_spells/10648/page.html

if you're concerned by his drinking and smoking, talk to him about it, say you're worried and think he should cut back. say you'll help him and do whatever to help him through it.
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Re: Extreme Advice Needed
By:
Post # 5
Thank you very much.
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Re: Extreme Advice Needed
By:
Post # 6
We broke up because he left a couple of his skeletons out and I found them. That skeleton being his ex girlfriend. She wouldn't leave him alone so I told him to go handle his stuff before coming back to me. What he didn't do with me was make amends so that when we did break up there were no problems but there is a hell of a lot of them. But what I can't understand is that if we're 'over and done with' why am I still seeing him in my dreams of going back to my home town. I haven't dreamed about him in months
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Re: Extreme Advice Needed
By: / Knowledgeable
Post # 7
Excellent point Chiron, I strongly concur!

I don't exactly know what sort of advice you are looking for. Love doesn't always last forever. That's why you have to enjoy the moment and not take it for granted. Sometimes when its gone, its gone. Some love lasts and some doesn't, not because the love wasn't there but because the two people involved couldn't compromise and work through problems. One, the other, or both were too rigid with their ways.

But honestly, if you weren't over him, moving onto another guy doesn't say that, and I'm sure that's how your ex saw it. If I (gods forbid) divorced my husband or he passed away before me, I don't believe I could ever be with another man. No one could fill that spot again. I enjoy what I have and do everything on my side to keep that going.

My grandfather died, and despite many offers, my grandmother would say, "it's til death do us part, not at death we stop loving one another. Just because he is dead, doesn't stop me from loving him and when I die, he'll be waiting for me." That's the way I see it. They were married for over 45 years. If one or the other moves on, then that love either wandered or ended.

"True" love like in fairy tales doesn't happen. It isn't paradise, there are ups and downs, but the test is if the two can get passed those troubled times as a team and not turn on one another, holding grudges. True love is when two people love each other unconditionally and it's not easy street. There is a lot of give and take and even sacrifice. But people are naturally selfish, and that becomes the bane of most relationships.

I've been married for 7 years in a 9 year relationship. So I'm not pulling this stuff out of a hat, its what I know from experience of nearly a decade of a wonderfully imperfect romance that I would never want to be perfect. He drives me insane but I love him for it.
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Re: Extreme Advice Needed
By:
Post # 8
I understand that and the guy I'm with doesn't make me happy and I've also figured out that my ex is only content he's not happy. I know I'm not happy because no matter what he seems to be in my thoughts constantly and I don't want him to be. How would you feel if you just ended an extremely good relationship, with all the good stuff that couples do and go through, for no real reason? I couldn't stand not having him near me and he no matter how mad he made/makes me with all the shyt he does my love for him will not diminish it just grows unconditionally. I'm still deciding on whether I should just go back to my home state or stay here and face all of it but it's caused me so much pain that I'm surprised my heart hasn't given out on me. Even in my new relationship I can't keep my mind off my ex. whatsoever.
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Re: Extreme Advice Needed
By:
Post # 9
I'm finding all this a bit hard to follow. Do you still have a new man? If so why are you seeing him when you are in love with someone else. Obviously the fact that you have a new boyfriend would be an obstacle in reuniting with your ex. If you are clairvoyant, just trust your intuition in the situation.
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Re: Extreme Advice Needed
By: / Novice
Post # 10
this new guy could be just someone you're with to get over the old ex. but i don't want to open that topic up.

dreaming about your ex doesn't mean much. i was with a guy for 3 years [friends for 2 and a half dated for the rest] i have been dating this amazing guy who i love for about a year now. recently i've had a couple dreams about my ex. does it mean i love him? no, his birthday was a few weeks ago, and i remembered we use to hang out, and i don't havd to buy him a gift. it happened last year too, it doesn't mean i still care about him, just that i'm thinking about the past. when someone meant so much to you, or you were really close with is no longer there, or in that same position, we long for those times. it's like nostalgia, thinking back to our childhoods, even dreaming about them.

maybe the two of you still have something, maybe not, i personally don't know, but don't put too much emphasis on a couple dreams. while yes i do believe in dream interpretation and dreams can hold keys to lifes problems, don't assume a dream about the old times means anything more than face value. a dream can be fun, confusing, scary, or prophetic. the mind works in symbols. your ex may not represent your love for him, it could represent the past, or someone with similar characteristics as your ex. dreams are very rarely that simple.

as i said before, talk to him. you should meditate, and think long and hard on your decision.
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