Hi guys, I wanted some opinions on something I've been thinking about.
I've found that when it comes to spirituality or religion, people usually say they're seeking enlightenment, their true selves, connection with deity etc.
But I've never found I'm all that interested in these things, more so because I feel like those needs are either already satisfied (such as my pantheism and animism giving a sense of connectivity with everything) or don't find them particularly important in my life (such as enlightenment, though I suppose learning is still important I don't necessarily seek deep wisdom or spiritual greatness in that sense).
Rather, my first motivations to find Paganism was curiosity, which I forgot when I gradually became more focused on doing it "right" than just finding a path that works for me. Even so, I've always been my own motivation, with a noticeable lack of an end goal other than to be happy, fulfilled and have fun on a sustainable path.
Is this motivation selfish? I've had difficulties committing to most religious paths because honestly I find little appeal in the idea of praising gods for the sake of praising Them. I respect the gods, and I honour certain deities on the celebration days on the Wheel of the Year, but other than that I feel like my path is a bit fluid and doesn't have the rigidity of a normal, structured religious faith.
I suppose I might be seeking validation, but only in the sense that I have no other opinions to draw from but my own. I'm a little bit unsure about what I'm doing, but I know that this is right for me, even if it seems a bit unorthodox for Paganism (wow I never expected to see those two in a sentence together).
Anyway, I'm not sure if you can even class what I do anymore as religious, it's more spirituality now though I do have a clear sense of deity or god/s in my life. It's just not in the normal pantheonic sense, I suppose.
Any guidance would be greatly appreciated!