When I was 18 I was raped in my house by a drug addict , held for 18hrs with a weapon , but I survived that , time went on .
I dumped my first love of almost 3 yrs cos he couldn't understand or accept it .
I decided to live life to the full and have fun . and I did , till
I met my husband to be in August 1988 , ( aged 19 ) thinking that I finally found a man that would love and protect me ...how wrong I was .
Within a month of dating him he started getting abusive and violent , drink related , I later found out he had been an alcoholic since the age of 12 .
By that time I stupidly convinced myself I loved him , he asked me to marry him , I said yes ...because I thought I could make him stop hitting me . and mistrusting me , we got married ...9 wks after we met , and from that day the violence started .
I was desperate to be a mother but it didn't happen for a year , so I went to the doctors .
I was told that I couldn't have children , so I filled my life with pets and joined the IVF clinic . 6 yrs later the doctors found out it was my husbands low sperm count , they treated him and I became pregnant , I sadly lost that baby at 11wks ..but 5 wks later I was pregnant with my son .
Life got a little bit better , my husband stopped drinking so much .
We moved to England whe my son was 6mths old in 1995., but I got pregnant with my daughter in 1996 and was homesick , we came back to Scotland .
Life got worse , he started drinking again .
Little did I know he was screwing my sister .
didn't find that out till 2008.
Anyway , lots happened till my daughter was born in 1996 ( 9 wks premature ) he was going out drinking and coming home with different underwear etc .
We moved house for a fresh start , but It wasn't a fresh start . I got pregnant with my youngest in 2001 , and when I was 6mths pregnant , he had a drink driving car crash , after spending the day in the pub with females .
I had enough . I lost all love for him .
But didn't kick him out till 2005 .
I tried to get on with it , but he still came to the house like he lived there , and wanted ( friends with benefits ) I didn't want that ,
Things turned nasty , he wouldn't stop constantly calling and txting .
I found out he was screwing a 20yr old girl ..he was 36 I was 37.
I tried to get over that and tried dating a long time workmate of mine , he found out , got kids to steal cd's from my house and found an online ( sexual ) chat with me and this guy .. he let our children read it ..aged ( 10 ) ( 8 ) and ( 3 ) and told them that mummy had an affair .
I didn't . I never even had sex with the guy , I wish I did now , cos he took all 3 kids off me . I had to fight through the courts for custody of my kids . I got my youngest after 10 days , but took almost 2 yrs to get my son ..after his dad rejected him .
but my ex brainwashed my teenage daughter against me , I didnt see her at all for almost 3 yrs , .
Till monday last week when he kicked her out for having a boyfriend .
Lots more to tell , but hope this is enough for now ,
I also found out in 2007 that he has a child , from before we were married . she is the same age as the 20yr old he was with .
Well now Feb 29th 2012 I got a call from my teenage daughter . asking If I could come get her ...her dad kicked her out for having an 18yr old boyfriend ..she is 15 .
I collected her and she was acting strange ,,I asked her If she was taking drugs etc ...then found out she swallowed a bottle of pills ...drove her straight to hospital ..where she had a seizure as soon as we entered the hospital doors .
They kept her overnight , and she got home next day ..turns out its the 2nd time she overdosed cos of her fathers controlling nature , she also self harmed .
She has been home with me for 3 mths now ..things can get difficult but I now have all 3 of my kids back home and happy where they belong .
My ex has turned to drink again and is using his anger as an excuse ( calling it bipolar ) somehow I don't think so . he's a narcassist .
Being positive has brought me a long way , and I hope now that life is going to be so much easier :)
Glad to say , my past is history , I am over it , through the help of a prophet who help me restore my husband back to his right sense,not knowing he was under a spell.. To tell you am stronger for the experience and i pray it should never happen to you out there,i know some people out there will have same or diffrent problem, you can get the prophet on firstname.lastname@example.org.
Never thought in 2005 I would be here to live to tell the tale , but I am :) and you will be too :) trust me x