Overcoming self sabotage

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Overcoming self sabotage
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Post # 1
Self sabotage is something many people deal with. I recently had a "spell", more a chant, come to me that I think may have been shown to me by a fairy its very simple. When you start or feel like you may or are engaging in self sabotaging behavior chant this to yourself and truly believe in it as your only hope of overcoming your self sabotage:
"Happiness without consequence."
that simple just keep repeating it in your head to your self or out loud.
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Re: Overcoming self sabotage
By: / Knowledgeable
Post # 2
Interesting chant. The problem is self destructive behavior is actually a subconscious desire to remain miserable. It's most commonly seen in personality disorders and is seen in extremes in sociopaths and borderline (BPD). See, no one is without a neurosis of some sort. We all are a little OCD, we can all be paranoid, and we can all undermine our own happiness due to deepset fears or conditioning. But "sanity" is within moderation/balance. When these normal isolated behaviors become exaggerated and consistent, that's when we are mentally "unstable". It's like a scale that's been tip too much in one direction.

So although your fairy may have meant well, she obviously doesn't understand the psychology behind self sabotage. "Happiness without consequence" shows the perfect psychology of that fear of the consequences that follow happiness. Get it out of your head. Happiness is in the perspective of the individual. There are no consequences, its a choice!

"Some of the happiest people in the world, go home smelling to high heaven at the end of the day" ~"God" from Bruce Almighty

People who self sabatoge have low self esteem but can act like they have an inflated ego. Their problem is that they either do not believe they can be happy (a fear that something will always go wrong) or they feel happiness knowing they can make/see others more miserable than them (but its shortlived so they have to keep doing it).

For someone who is self sabotaging themselves, I would suggest working on acquiring self love, defining what happiness means to you in a free writing way (stream of consciousness) and re-evaluating what can and cannot obtain that, that you do. Have a good friend help, they see more than you do.

If you still cannot find improvement, seek counseling.
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Re: Overcoming self sabotage
By: / Beginner
Post # 3

Consequence can be good

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Re: Overcoming self sabotage
By:
Post # 4
I totally agree with you. I think that the chant was meant to be a temporary band aid solution (which I forgot to add). I think its something to stop the behavior for a little while. I believe that if you deal with self sabotage then you should seek counsel from someone who knows what they are doing when it comes to the human psyche. To me the chant means "I will allow myself to be happy without punishing myself for it."
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Re: Overcoming self sabotage
By: / Knowledgeable
Post # 5
I understand. If it works for you, more power to you =)

But for those that believe it is a cure all for their mental condition, I'm just saying, they may need more than a mantra to conquer their problem. I believe everyone has the capability of healing themselves, its just not many have the willpower to do it alone. And that's ok. That's why there are people out there that will help.
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Re: Overcoming self sabotage
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Post # 6
your A LITTLE OCD :O well you see I am,,,,,
OCD (VERY, tries to choose door, walks into pillar)
ADHD
DELUSIONAl(or I see magic :3)
CANNOT FEEL COMAPSSION (what's the word for cold blooded?)
And well you like to lit more?
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