Who do you tell?

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Who do you tell?
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Post # 1
I've only just started on this path and I wonder whether or not I should share it with my kids. I had an extremely religious upbringing (Christian) and I've always felt that was a mistake on my parents part. Everyone should be free to choose their own path.

My daughter seems to have the gift of divination (she sees words in her head--there's a lot more to it, but don't want to get into it on this thread). Today she saw my Oracle deck and asked me what it was. I wasn't sure what to say, so I changed the subject. It's not that I want to hide it, I just don't want to influence her.

What's your experience been like? With kids, siblings or friends?
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Re: Who do you tell?
By: / Beginner
Post # 2
I think you should allow your children to know what you practice and believe in. It opens up their own spirituality, and they might say "Oh, I believe in this too" or "Hm... I kind of have something else in mind". By understanding your religion and lifestyle, you are opening them up to be honest about their own choices. :)
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Re: Who do you tell?
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Post # 3
That's a great point, xEmbraceX. I guess I'm just afraid of "brainwashing" them. Like I said, I grew up being taught that everything in the Bible was fact. When I got older and wised up, I would say things once in a while to contradict the Christian faith--nothing harsh or condescending, but just things I'd come to realize in my adult years. I found that my daughter would often pick up on those things and sometimes repeat them.

I think, in a way, you're right though. She has to choose, therefore I need to give her something to choose. My parents have always suggested I send her to church, but I refused for years. Maybe I need to do show her a little bit of both. And introduce her to other religions as well.
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Re: Who do you tell?
By: / Beginner
Post # 4
You won't brainwash them. Just be sure to specify that they are your beliefs, and that everyone else is entitled to their own thoughts. When teaching them about your religion, say something like:

"Personally, I believe that..."

"I think that..."

Use emphasis on "I" and "My", especially if they are younger children (Under the age of fourteen).
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Re: Who do you tell?
By: / Beginner
Post # 5
That is a very good idea. Show them a little bit of everything. Send them to churches of different faiths (I would participate as well for obvious reasons) and be open-minded about what they talk about. If you show that you disapprove of what they say, then your daughter will copy your train of thought and that won't help her learn to be accepting.
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Re: Who do you tell?
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Post # 6
I'll have to remember that. She's only eleven and my son is four, so he hasn't asked any questions yet. I don't think I will spring it on her, but rather wait until she asks again.

She knows that I've been studying Wicca for the past year and asked me a few times if I was a witch. I did explain to her that I was interested in learning, for research purposes. But I haven't told her how my interests have changed since then.

The only thing I've done so far is explain the difference between how witches are depicted in the mainstream and who they really are.

I've thought about doing an Oracle reading with her, but I think I will wait for a little bit longer.
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Re: Who do you tell?
By: / Beginner
Post # 7
Sounds good. Wait until she asks, that way she doesn't feel forced into learning about something. Don't hide any of your things like you used to (Except those that can cause harm, like poisonous herbs, athame, boline, lighters... The obvious things to hide)

I wish you luck :D The thing about being open about your religion to your daughter, as it will strengthen your bonding.
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Re: Who do you tell?
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Post # 8
Thanks for the advice! I'll try that :)
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Re: Who do you tell?
By: / Novice
Post # 9
11 and 4? the 11 year old will probably grasp it better, at age 4 you'll have to explain you're not a witch like in faerie tales [unless you want to go the Wizard of Oz good witch approach] you should sit them down and explain to them that you study magic that you don't follow Christianity but this in no way effects them. if they still wish to go to church, celebrate Christmas, and everything else, it's still fine. try to explain to them your new found beliefs. later, try to pull your daughter aside and tell her if she wishes to learn a bit more because she's older, you can show her some things, like your oracle cards. for the 4 year old, you could do fun little activities, like around Yule he could decorate a Yule log or something.

don't go deep into religious things like teaching them about the sabbats and the gods and stuff, but show them you're no different now, and that you're not forcing them to change. you could figure out neat activities they could do around the sabbats, baking, crafts, story telling, so forth. little things like that so if you want to learn more when they're older they know it's not evil. the religious family might be the hard part, they find out, don't know what they'd do. feel it out, but you should tell them too.
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Re: Who do you tell?
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Post # 10
These are some great suggestions! Thanks :) I like the idea of doing crafts and baking. They love that anyway and it's how things are done at school for different religions, so I will definitely try that. I left my oracle cards out the other morning and she was very excited to see what they were. She looked through them and enjoyed every second of it.

I think I will ease into things. Start with the arts and crafts, and then move onto bigger things.

As far as my family is concerned, I'm not worried. I told my parents (my father was a minister and is now a theology professor) that the Christian faith wasn't for me. I explained to them there are contradictions I feel exist within it. Even though I could tell they were disappointed, they didn't try to change my mind. I really appreciated that.

I'm still discovering things about paganism. I'm not sure which religion I will follow, if any. I happened on this path because of my work, but it's really stuck with me and I plan to explore it further. Because of my history (and disappointment) with Christianity, I'm almost afraid to put faith in any religion, but I will see what happens.
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