Once again, in my search to understand things I looked to ap for the answers. I went in, with my only intention being to find whoever might be able to help me understand. I was once again led to my higher self. Of course she was sitting outside a massive library with a book again. When I approached her, I felt calm and at peace, where before I had felt like a war inside of me. I asked her what I am missing and what I need to do. Her reply was that I am still hiding my true nature from others and myself. I asked if I could see the book she held, and she handed it to me. It was massive, yet all the pages were blank. I told her I thought it was funny that she was reading a blank book. Her reply to me was that it is blank, because that is what I choose to see at this time. She got up and told me she was with me always, before heading into the library. I left with more confusion then I started with.
I think perhaps the place to begin is with the last statement.
The higher self is not so much an external being, as much as an extension of the self personified in a manner that allows us to assimilate and understand. It is the mingling of the knowledge of all experiences, all knowledge, that each of your souls might possess.
In seeking her out in this way, you make her an external force. An entity to ask for advice and wisdom. The book is blank because you have not looked within yourself to discover the "writing" that resides there.
Take the next step and merge the identity of the higher self with who you are now.
I do believe she is an extension of me. However, I was told I am not ready for a merge yet, till I figure things out. That bit was confusing to me. How would one go about such a thing?
"Merging" is just a matter of acceptance of being an aspect of the whole, and viewing it all as the self rather than the "higher self." If that makes any sense.
I have some difficulty with the concept of the higher self, as I was actually discussing with someone else. Often as we identify the higher self we give it a name, or even associate it with a totem animal, named spirit, or even a deity. In doing this however we will occasionally, unintentionally, project aspects that we have heard of or read over top of what is there plainly. It is a subconscious process, that is more difficult to undo than do, and in some ways incurs difficulty in simply accepting the "higher self" as simply "you."
I'm not sure I make much sense there, but there it is.
You make a lot of sense. People tend to give grand titles and names for that which they do not understand, in an attempt to understand them. It is odd, because it just muddies everything up more. I get the concept that she is me. I always saw my "higher self" as a more knowledgeable and balanced form of myself. Not necessarily a separate being, yet beyond my current conscious understanding :)
You said it yourself, you are looking to her for answers because you see her as more knowledgeable than you. But if you TRULY accept that she and you are one, and your knowledge is her knowledge, the book would not be empty. She can see the words on the page, but you cannot because you separate her knowledge from yours. She is telling you not to "merge" because you fear it. She is your subconscious, and she will embody your subconscious thoughts, including fears. Some people fight their subconscious because it can disagree with what we consciously desire. Look to your higher self for understanding of your entire being, but do not listen to it against your better judgement. If you know she is you, than make it so.
What if that book is empty in order to be filled with all the things you are about to understand and achieve ,once you stop fighting with yourself .I had fought with my high self so long time and so hard i missed to learn her lessons ,it actually was for understanding not for fighting .You will not start to understend your high self till you hide .You see you can learn and create things only when you are blank ,because there is emptiness within you to be filled .My high self used to tell me that knowledge comes to us when we are blank vesells and when we do not carry with us all the extra luggage from the past and we have no expectation from the future ,because all those fill our emptiness with mundane stuff .I also see my high self asseparated of myself not like just aspect of my self .And if that is the case there is reason for that ,even when things in subconscious occur there is reason behind that .I guess when we see ourself from another point of view we can not lie to ourselves.
i get it, but it's hard to say in words [if anyone understands me]
the book could be one of two things, either your life and it's blank because your have yet to write it and your higher self was reading what might happen. or, it reveals information about yourself, but you lack the wisdom at the moment.
since you now feel calmer than before, i think you're on the right track to seeing the words. keep at it. i can't help much more because most interpretations especially astral has to be personal, because a genaric interpretation could leave out inportant facts only you could know.
